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The Habits: How To Build and Stick Them

Who we are is shaped by our habits. While we recognize that developing beneficial habits isn’t always simple.

Habits affect whether we are happy or sad, based on whether they are healthy or unhealthy. Whether healthy or harmful. Whether you’re tired or well-rested. Whether strong or fragile. The influence of habits is enormous.

Our attitudes, behaviors, and decision-making abilities are shaped by our habits. And they have an impact on every part of our existence.

But, before we can create healthy habits, we must first grasp what habits are and how they form. We also have to know what errors to avoid during the process.

Let’s look at the art of developing excellent habits, such as the science around them, and how you may set yourself up for success in developing new, better habits.

What exactly is a habit?

A habit is a desire of doing something over and over, whether it be harmful or beneficial to one’s health.

A good habit can assist you in achieving your objectives, growing personally and professionally, and feeling fulfilled. Unfortunately, not all habits are beneficial.

The brain’s reward-seeking processes promote habits. They are frequently triggered by a specific event. For example, passing past a café and smelling coffee beans may make you crave a cup. When you are pressured at work, you may want to light a cigarette.

Habits become a routine aspect of your life after a while.

Here are a few more instances of habits:

  • Brushing your teeth following a meal
  • When you get inside a car, you put on your seatbelt.
  • When you get home from work, you have a glass of wine.
  • When you’re anxious at work, eat sweet or salty meals.

The brain’s technique of becoming more effective is to form habits. In terms of the brain, the more things you can perform without spending time worrying about them, the better.

And our brain’s tendency towards efficiency might be beneficial.

Drinking a green smoothie every morning, for example, is beneficial to your health. And the fact that you don’t have to relearn how to drive your automobile every day means you have dependable transportation.

Of course, this efficiency might have a detrimental impact.

For example, chewing your nails every time you attend a meeting at work might be harmful to your nails. Tooth decay might occur if you do not wash your teeth after meals.

The science of forming habits

We’ll go through the four phases of habit building in this section.

How are habits formed?

The process through which behaviors become habitual is known as habit formation. It might be a deliberate procedure or something that happens unexpectedly.

For example, you were most certainly instructed as a youngster to wash your hands. And after a time, washing your hands becomes automatic. It wasn’t on purpose; it just happened after a lot of repetition.

Replacing your nightly drink of wine with a glass of water, on the other hand, is a conscious decision. Decaffeinated coffee is an excellent substitute for caffeinated coffee in the morning.

One thing to remember about the habit-forming procedure is that it does not occur suddenly. It’s a never-ending feedback loop that runs and is active at all times you’re breathing. This leads us to the habitual loop.

What exactly is the habit loop?


According to Charles Duhigg, author of “The Power of Habit,” at the heart of every durable habit is a mental pattern known as the “habit loop.”

The habit loop is a four-step cycle that all habits follow. The four steps are always the same and are always performed in the same order:

1- Cue/trigger

Your mind is continuously analyzing your surroundings for signs as to where the rewards lie. The cue is the first indication that you’re getting near to a reward, such as money or love. This phase instructs your brain to initiate a behavior.

Because the signal indicates that you are nearing a reward, it will automatically lead to the second step: the yearning.

2- Craving

Cravings are the driving factor behind all habits. They provide you with a motive to act. What you crave, though, is not the habit itself, but the shift in the condition that it produces.

Because of the comfort it provides, you desire a glass of wine. You want to wear your seatbelt because it helps you feel protected.

Cravings, in the end, arise from a need to alter your behavior.

3- Reaction

The reaction is the action you do. It might be expressed as a concept or as an action. The way you respond is determined by how motivated you are and how difficult the activity is to do.

For example, if an action requires a lot of effort than you are willing to expend, you will not perform it.

4- Reward

The reward is the objective of any habit. The reward is noticed by the cue, desired by the yearning, and obtained by the response.

For example, suppose you’re strolling across town and stumble upon a bakery. Observing the bakery would be the cue. The desire would be for a slice of chocolate cake. And the answer would be to walk inside and order and have a slice of cake.

We want rewards for 2 purposes: they fulfill our needs and educate us on which behaviors to avoid in the future.

How To Build a Habit

When developing new habits, you will frequently be replacing old ones. Here are seven techniques for replacing unhealthy behaviors with healthier ones:

1- Remove triggers

Target the people, places, and activities in your thoughts that are connected with unhealthy habits. Then modify your attitude toward them.

Avoid shopping centers, for example, if you have a shopping addiction. If you want to stop smoking, don’t go outdoors smoking when your buddies do.

Persistent stress can also lead to bad conduct. To prevent triggers, make an effort to actively regulate your stress levels.

2- Decrease cravings

Remember that desires arise from a desire to alter your interior condition. This implies that by understanding how you want to feel, you may lessen cravings. Then, to obtain that emotion, engage in healthy behavior.

For example, if you want to relax, take a shower instead of cigarettes. Eat a banana instead of your fourth cup of coffee for the day if you’re searching for energy.

3- Make a bad habit tough to Make.


Habits could only form if the behavior is clear enough to do. You probably wouldn’t be able to do the behavior if you make it tough. For example, if you have a poor tendency of staying up late at night, start working earlier in the morning.

You’ll think twice about staying up late if you know you’ll be physically weary and running on a few hours of sleep.

4- Identify the source

One of the most significant strategies to modify your negative behaviors is to identify the source of them. For example, you may learn that you stress eat because you require coping mechanisms.

Knowing that a lack of coping mechanisms is at the basis of your habit, you may work to strengthen it.

Realizing that a lack of coping mechanisms is at the foundation of your habit allows you to properly nurture your mental well-being. To cope with stress, for example, you might utilize self-care activities such as mindful breathing.

5- Establish healthy routines

It all comes down to lifestyle choices when it comes to developing excellent habits. One of the most effective strategies to modify your lifestyle is to improve your everyday routine. Make a plan for your day and incorporate healthy activities wherever they make sense.

For example, when you wake up, eat a vegetable and a fruit. During your lunch break, take a rejuvenating snooze. In the evenings, go for a peaceful walk. Make certain that the practices you select are both realistic and healthful.

6- Replace a negative habit with a good habit

Sometimes the simplest approach to change a habit is to replace it with a better one. For example, instead of a slice of cake every night, substitute a baked cinnamon apple. Instead of a glass of wine, replace it with a glass of sparkling water.

7- Increase intrinsic motivation

To develop intrinsic motivation, you must believe two things: that you have the option and freedom to behave as you see fit, and that completing a task would teach you anything new and affect your quality of life.

Knowing how to cope with bad emotions is one of the easiest methods to believe these two facts.

You’ll also need a method to track your progress toward your new habit. Making progress is a powerful incentive. It is as easy as writing it down and putting it in your mirror. Making a nice graphic or spreadsheet might also be an option.

Finally, by making your objective public, you may take the intrinsic drive to the next level. Inform a close friend or announce on social media. A took form to your own goals might serve as an effective accountability partner.

How To Keep a Habit Going

Now that you’ve learned how to form excellent habits, here are some pointers to help you keep them:

1- Include it in your schedule.

When you don’t practice new beneficial habits on a daily basis, it’s simple for them to slip by the wayside. Life can get in the way of habit formation when we have a lot on our plates. Make your new behaviors a part of your daily routine to avoid this.

For example, during COVID-19, you may have started doing virtual exercises to establish a decent work-life balance. Incorporate self-management into your everyday routine to ensure you keep this good habit.

To efficiently manage your time and optimize your habits, employ time management strategies.

2- Establish a welcoming environment

Connect yourself with like-minded friends who hold your interests. Why? Because, as humans, we are tremendously impacted by what others are doing or feeling surrounding.

According to one research, mental exertion is contagious. Simply completing a task beside someone who puts in a lot of effort can help you do the same.

Being in the company of like-minded people is also motivating. For example, you may have developed the habit of going for a morning run. Making relationships with other runners can provide you with the extra energy and drive you to need to keep to your running routine.

Being in a supportive group of individuals with similar interests and objectives might be the single most powerful motivator for helping you keep your habit going.

Inform your family, friends, and coworkers about your goals to keep your new habit going. Sharing your habit objectives adds accountability and support to your habit-keeping efforts.

3- Make use of reminders

One of the most difficult aspects of habit formation is remembering to do it in the first place. This is especially true when you are just starting with your habit. As previously said, it takes time for acts to become regular habits.

Set reminders for yourself to help you stick to your habit. This might be a visible reminder, such as a post-it note on the fridge or a mirror.

Why not make use of technology? Set up notifications on your smartphone or use one of the several habit monitoring applications available. Some wearable stress and sleep monitors provide the ability to create reminders.

You may also add reminders about why you’ve decided to commit to your new habit, which will help you remain on track and keep it.

4- Exercise self-compassion.

It is tough to form a habit. But keeping it up might be much more difficult.

Throwing too much stress on yourself to keep your habit might be harmful. For example, if you fail to maintain a habit, it is easy to focus solely on the failure. Negative self-talk and automatic ideas such as “I’ve failed again” or “I’ll never succeed” can set you back.

Instead, practice self-compassion and emotional management to avoid being overly judgmental of oneself. Remind yourself that developing and maintaining habits is a process. And failure is an unavoidable part of the process.

Don’t berate yourself, and instead concentrate on what activities you can do in the future.